Caution:

So give me all your bad. Give me all the worst ideas imaginable. Now give me all the best. Give me the best ideas ever.. Go ahead, because I really would like to see what you have that could possibly beat what I have. I'll wait..

Ok, that is enough waiting. Today's topic boys and girls: Zombie Sex

Something I never would have thought another human being (other then my sick self) would think of. I recently found a listing on Craigslist in need of a human being wanting sex with another human being with a few minor conditions:

- Must *look* like a zombie and more importantly, an **attractive** zombie.

- Must *act* like a zombie.

- Don't be shy. (This entails growling, blood, etc.)

- In addition, (But not required) *Zombie Experience*

On a further note, this person has given a description of the aforementioned sex. Classic zombie scene, I must say. In which, the "human" is going about their daily life doing human stuff, listening to the news on a miniature radio, hearing about the horrors going on in the streets around them. When all of a sudden, who bursts through the door!? Zombie(s)!!!! Ahhhhhhhhhh. The puny human screams and shouts, begs for mercy with a long winded

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooo!!!!"

The human's clothes are torn off in a frenzy of violence and hunger! "Ahhhhhhhh" Cue the fake blood!

This person certainly knows what they are doing.

Now, after I read the ad once or twice (and being immediately disappointed that said person lives no where near me), I realized that this was not a man. But a woman. For some reason i automatically assumed that this sick individual who made my heart warm and buttery like a fresh cinnamon bun, was a man. This is the part where I take a serious and deeper look into my soul and question, what it truly means to be human.

If the zombie question does one thing, it is to provoke the question of the very existence of the human race. So what am I if not a human? The point is, it doesn't matter. No matter how strongly I believe in equality, women's rights and the like, it was wrong of me to judge the woman as a man. Especially in my case, that since I identified with this person so strongly, why did my braaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaain automatically go to that place?

In my personal opinion, its a whole matter of braaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaain-washing and conditioning. We are fed and train to act, think, behave, and solve things differently on purpose. So, on the other hand, being a Zombie must entail a pretty unbiased and carefree life, don't you think? Ponder that for a while.

Women zombies like brains just as much as men zombies. Male humans are just as scared of their brains getting eaten as female humans.

And on that note, I am going to email Miss DD. =P